Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Dear Son,

Contrary to popular belief I do not enjoy punishing you. I am neither trying to ruin your life, nor make it hard. When you choose to rage against the rules you are given, however, you leave me no choice.

Contrary to popular belief I do love you. Unconditionally and irrevocably. It is infinite, without beginning or end, and continues to grow as I watch you begin to morph into the man you will become.

Contrary to popular belief, as your mother, I am even more upset than you right now that you had to be punished. You may be on a school bus, grumping and grumbling over your evil witch of a mother (and, yes, I'm aware you're possibly using harsher language than that...but allow me this tiny bit of delusion, okay?); however, I'm trying to function through a mountain of work while nursing a broken heart. Broken because I was forced to break yours. Broken because being a good parent means you have to do the hardest thing in the world (i.e., cause your child heartache) in order to help your child learn right from wrong.

One day, far from now, you will understand the difficulties and intricacies of being a parent. You'll know that it is both the best and worst job in the world. Most importantly, however, you'll know that every grounding, every punishment was something far greater than Mom being mean and evil. It was Mom whispering, "I love you more than myself. I love you enough to cause you a little pain now, to prevent you from suffering great pain in your future. I love you enough to stand my ground, to teach you to follow the rules. I will gladly cry for hours after punishing you, if it means that you will be better for it. I will suffer through a thousand heartbreaks if it prevents one from coming your way in the future because of what I should have done."

Always & Forever,


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