So earlier this week I made plans to go today to see the new Twilight movie with my mother. It was running at 12:40 PM, and I wouldn't make it home in time to get my 8 year old off of the school bus. Normally, as in every other time since my oldest was born, this would inevitably mean me canceling my plans and being there. It never would have dawned on me to arrange for someone else to get my child off of the bus and keep him until I made it home. This time, however, was different. I was determined to do something for myself. In order to keep myself from chickening out I pre-ordered my non-refundable tickets. I then told my husband to arrange for his parents to get our boy off of the bus on Friday afternoon.
When I woke up this morning I found that it had snowed last night. Not much, just enough that I had to go outside and spend 15 minutes clearing my windshield and sweeping a path on the porch and stairs. My hubby came out as I was finishing to go to work, and offered to go ahead and take my SUV down the hill where I could just walk to it and be on the road. Then possible disaster struck. In just around 10 minutes, the sky opened up and dumped almost an inch of snow on the ground. Not just any snow, either, but that fine powder that ski resorts love because it packs down to ice with the slightest pressure. I made the decision to keep the boys home from school, as it was just too treacherous for them to be on a school bus. I wavered for a moment over my plans for the day, then told myself that my 16 year old was more than capable of taking care of his brother for the day - another first for me!
By the time I needed to leave, the roads had turned from snow covered to almost inch thick ice - and I was going to have to drive at least a mile on the curvy, hilly road to the nearest intersection where the road would be treated. Nervous, unsure, anxious, worried, I crept my way down the hill. At the end of the mile I discovered that the roads were, in fact, treated and that the rest of my journey would be uneventful.
So, I went to brunch with my mother, went to see Twilight (which is OMG! AMAZING!!), stopped in Target to snag some new undershirts for my oldest and a Christmas gift for my youngest, and then decided to run and pick up some pizzas and cheese sticks for dinner so that I didn't have to cook. I called my boys on the way home and had the oldest throw a quick salad together to go with.
Now it's bedtime and as I sit and reflect upon my day I am just so proud of myself! I faced my fears and drove on wintry roads, refused to allow myself to feel bad for having a day out, saw a movie that I've waited anxiously for for quite a while, and more than anything else I can rest assured in the fact that my boys are quite alright without me stressing myself to the max. They want me to be happy. That is a true gift, that knowledge, and I know that it will help me on my way to becoming the me I used to be.
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